A Cry Not Heard; The Absent Parent

During this past year, I had to come to terms with the fact that my children are not the part of my life I always hoped for.  I know there are many issues they deal with on a daily basis, i.e. their futures. When they go home for dinner and an evening with siblings, it is not my home but the one where their father and stepmother raised them. I hear very little from them and find I have only to search Facebook to get a small morsel of the decisions they have made, where they are now and sometimes a snippet of longed for dreams. So, you might ask, what’s the problem?…

… The problem is that I would love to be with them like that. However, they are not ready for any relationship with me and I had to let go. Being the absent parent, it is easy for them to put whatever memory of me and their stepdad from their minds during the bustle of the Holidays and whatever preparations for the events up and coming in their lives. Two of them have joined the military and the other is still in college and has a super job.  I am so very proud of all three and carry this pride privately.   I cry out that I may not ever have the relationship I desire with any of them.  It is not in my hands any longer, but given into better ones. Those belonging to the Comforter.

This Holiday Season, I stayed the absent parent and said not a word, nor sent any to them. All I can say now and for the future, when they might want to get to know me, is simply this: “I love all three of you with all of my heart and wish for you all every happiness and dreams for a bright future.”

“Writing is my dream. From romance to dragons; fairies to fantasy worlds, this is where I live and play. Thanks be to God!” – Lisa Hannah Wells

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